...and thought it sounded like a fine idea, Chris, so I've just joined. Thank you.
On the way home from work I was going over in my mind what I might write in my first post, but now I'm here, I'm not finding it that easy to do.
How many miscarriages did my wife and I experience? I can't really say - and maybe that is part of the problem. People say that I've got a phenomenal memory, faces, names, trivial little incidents from my childhood - so how can I not remember a devastating statistic like that? Because I think my mind has just tried to blank it out for protection. So, going back to the question - how many miscarriages did we have? Maybe 4, maybe 5, maybe 6 - it could be 7. We do speak about them from time to time, but I'm struggling to walk in the other room now and just ask.
You're right, people do find it difficult to know where to turn. My wife found out about a year ago from my Mum that I could have had a sibling, but she miscarried. So she took the best part of 50 years to "drop it into a conversation" and my Dad never once mentioned it - stiff upper lip 'n' all that, I suppose.
I'm honoured that you guys have felt the courage to join the forum and share your feelings.
I think I will, too, at some point but as I said in paragraph 1 I'm not finding it easy right now as its brought the emotions flooding back, but I will aim to muster up a bit of strength.
There is a good eventual outcome to the situation, but there were some truly awful experiences along the way.
Evening Dave, Firstly, my condolences go out to your and your wife on the miscarriages that you have suffered. You have taken a massive step Dave, just by commenting here. Take all the time in the world you need, seeing others post in the forum ‘May’ inspire you to do so at some point, but you know what, even if you don’t, I hope you get some solace from joining the page and see others sharing their posts. You’re right that people keep everything bottled up, as you say, 50 years to bring it up in conversation and your dad never. That says it all. I’m hoping to be able to change that ‘stigma’ one person at a time, but I can’t do it alone. So when you are ready to talk, I’ll be ready to listen. If you’d even prefer to talk in private, feel free to drop me a DM. Stay safe Dave, Chris