I am humbled and inspired by the people who have shared their stories about miscarriage here. I am struggling to find the words myself but here goes.. My partner and I suffered a miscarriage a year ago and then another a few months ago. Both were at the same time in the pregnancy, around 9 or 10 weeks and before anyone knew about the pregnancies. The first pregnancy was incredibly painful for my partner and although the second was a little easier it has taken her a few months to physically recover. I have tried to support her as best I can, though I've struggled to know how I have felt over the past year. I haven't spoken to many people whereas my partner has many friends and her family she talks to. I have thrown myself into work as a distraction and I can become very numb when my partner talks about the events. More recently I have been feeling despair and anger; I am sometimes deeply frustrated. Underneath there is sadness though I can struggle to find an outlet - it sounds mad but I don't cry easily. I work in mental health and it astounds me that I can deal with other people's sadness but struggle to access my own... A few weeks after the first miscarriage I broke down uncontrollably in front of a group of people when out.... which actually felt like a relief... We are attempting to try again for a child, though my partner is really not sure out of fear of going through this again. And this only adds to the despair.. it doesn't feel like a great place to try for a family..... I guess we are in this place now, and it's not getting over it ... it's just a matter of time before we move through it together... how ever long that will be...