So,
I split up with my previous girlfriend of 10 years,
Met the most amazing girl months down the line, just after Christmas she told me she was pregnant, something I was told would be a miracle for myself as I was told my count was too low,
A week later my girl started feeling pains in her side, we went to get it checked out and sitting by her bed side we were told the pregnancy had gone ectopic,
My world crashed around me, everything fell from the skies and the floor opened up and ate me alive,
I tried to hold it all in as my girlfriend was laid on the bed holding my hand, they kept her in overnight so they could remove the ectopic,
I went back to the house when she came out of surgery as I wasn’t allowed to stay,
I cried all night and blamed myself, even though the doctors said it was neither of our fault,
We’d only been together for 5 months, the baby wasn’t planned or unwanted at all, I’d already got carried away reading pregnancy for dads books, thinking of names and planning our future whilst she remained cool and calm throughout.
To say it destroyed my soul is an understatement, I truly feel that was my once in a lifetime miracle and that I’d never have that again,
Since it all happened we parted but still talk, we try to help each other thru this time but I seem to be in the darker place than she is right now,
I just hope reaching out will help the pain of this,
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